Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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