the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
