he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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