Your mouth is God's brothel.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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