i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
