Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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