dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I can't turn off my feet"
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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