You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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