omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Dicks are not precious.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
