she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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