Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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