I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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