You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
and she was petting her beer can
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
