We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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