Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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