There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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