Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
