So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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