that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
