Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize