At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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