so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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