Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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