:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
