So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
ttyl tear gas
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
