fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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