someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
