I'm pants shitting drunk right now
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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