Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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