Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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