yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
