I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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