if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
