if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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