Whod you bang
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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