Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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