As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
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