Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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