So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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