i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
