That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize