i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize