Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
then he tried to convert me to islam
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
