yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I just found puke in my bra..
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
