Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
