You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
