You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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