Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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