Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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