Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
